Win, Tusky, Win
Utah needs its edge back. They need Big Tusk Energy. They need the Eye of the Tiger - check that - they need the Eye of the Mammoth.
TL;DR: The Mammoth snapped the slump and it’s time to crank up the energy like Rocky charging up the stairs.
Now that the doom and gloom of the last month has finally burned off, I’m feeling something I haven’t felt in a while.
Motivation.
I’m ramped up. I’m ready to go. It’s time to quit my bitching and complaining and get fully on board for the boys.
I woke up extra early this morning, cracked a dozen eggs into a glass, chugged it, threw on my rattiest gray sweats, and sprinted up State Street all the way to the Capitol building. There, I triumphantly shadowboxed and danced around with my fists in the air like a man possessed.
Why? Probably because I watched my favorite movie, Rocky, last night. I needed the jolt. The Utah Mammoth need it too. And I hope they feel the same. I recommend turning up Eye of the Tiger as loud as humanly possible in the locker room at practice, morning skate, and pregame leading into the showdown against Vegas on Monday night. Hit play on that motherfucker, then turn it up to 11.
The Mammoth have drawn a rematch against Apollo Creed just days after a 4-1 knockout loss at home. The weight of that miserable losing streak is finally gone thanks to a hard-earned dub over the New York Rangers on Saturday.
They remembered how to win. Now they need to remember how to fly. It’s Rocky II time. The title belt is up for grabs, not literally, but you get it.
That’s who they are, god dammit.
This is a team of destiny. A team chosen to become something great. Think of all the crazy, improbable things that had to happen to get this team in Mountain Blue, Salt White, and Rock Black. Narratively, victory is the only logical ending. I believe that. I can already see the championship parade rolling down State Street in my mind.
This team is capable. Did you see the fear they instilled in opponents the second Tusky thawed out from his frozen slumber? And by the way, how did he immediately know how to skate? Was he skating in full hockey gear tens of millions of years ago? Lots of questions there.
But here’s the point: Utah needs its edge back. They need Big Tusk Energy. They need the Eye of the Tiger - check that - they need the Eye of the Mammoth. Whatever was in that egg drink this morning has me firing on all cylinders.
Seriously, play that song in the locker room, Kells. There’s something there. Last season, my parody rendition of that Survivor hit directly led to Nick Schmaltz’s first goal of the season after a prolonged slump. I’m happy to run it back if needed.
It’s a tough stretch ahead for Utah. Danger is everywhere. Not only do they face Vegas on Monday and Montreal on Wednesday - both teams who smacked them earlier this season - they also have a grueling six-game run afterward.
I say bring it on. The team is up to the task. I’m manifesting it right now. If they could survive and thrive during Spooky Season at the end of October, what do they have to fear in No-Joke November and Doomsday December?
The Dallas Stars?
Please. Any city willing to ship out Luka Dončić for Anthony Davis cannot be taken seriously.
The St. Louis Blues?
Give me a break. They’re so broke their goalie has to steal Ovechkin memorabilia.
San Jose Sharks?
Yeah, right. The tech bubble is about to burst. Those mansions will be on clearance by spring.
Anaheim Ducks?
A Mickey Mouse franchise. (Not an insult - I love Disney. It’s just true.)
Vancouver Canucks?
Grow up. That city nearly burned itself down after losing one Stanley Cup Final.
Calgary Flames?
Ooooh, scary. A team whose uniforms look like Ronald McDonald’s workout clothes. Make me a burger, Ronald.
Jokes aside, this stretch is crucial. It could make or break the season early. Staying in the playoff race all year is critical. If things start to slip, a trade or a coaching change becomes inevitable.
It’s tough. That’s what makes it worth it. Pressure is a privilege. This is a chance for the Mammoth to show how great they are. Everyone on the roster has a role. Everyone has more to give.
It’s time to put their tusks up the NHL’s butt.
They’ve been up against the ropes this month.
But I didn’t hear no bell.
So get up and start swinging.
Win, Tusky, win.